My friend taught me this while I was living with her and her dog. One day I came down the stairs and her dog was in the trash, and I gasped in shock. She immediately fled the scene. She heard me coming down the stairs, it was the gasp that let her know, she was doing something wrong.
So I used that while raising my own dog. The gasp is so powerful because it only means what it means. It’s not inherently frightening like a clap or any kind of yelling. It’s a whisper in comparison to that kind of communication. It is not intrinsically punishment. It’s just communication. It’s honest, “I am shocked that you would do such a thing.”
It is the bridge between establishing disappointment and removing the dog from the trash.
In addition to that, there is some humor in it, some light heartedness. Some, “no biggie” type energy to it. Because am I really shocked he was in the trash? No.
I would use this in other moments too. Key moments where I believe I swayed Gunther from frustration into humor. I do believe it played a part in his appropriate use of resources with other dogs. If Gunther was unfair to another dog, or swiped something, I would use the gasp. And he would take that gasp, drop his frustration with that other dog and engage in some humor. Digging holes. High pitched, non threatening, playful squeals. Bouncy body. He would express himself and let it go. He would shift from a path that may lead to an altercation with another dog into a path of happy go lucky that now alleviated tensions and also just set an example for that dog to be able to do the same. He continues to play a vital role in rehabbing dogs who struggle with resource aggression.
The gasp builds on that draw. The gasp has the power to pull Gunther out of drowning in one whirlpool and flowing and floating into another. It’s a question, not an action. It does not force his hand. The gasp is daring my dog to make a better choice and rejoicing when they do.
Yelling, harsh, scary noises have a tendency to whip that whirlpool faster. That dog digs in deeper, and steadier over their position. Because these noises are inherently punishing. It’s discomforting and causes concern. They are doing something that obviously feels right to them, and they are punished for it. This does not do anything for you or your dog. It happens. I react too. I knee jerk. But in those moments, I know I’ve done nothing good for me or my dog and with humility, I put that lesson in my pocket for next time. I’ve just pushed him a little further out from my whirlpool. And I’ll have to navigate how to swim out to him again.